A Wish for Ashley

Earlier this week, a producer from CBS contacted us, intrigued by our story, which he read in the Globe.  He made clear that he could not promise that anything would materialize as a result of his interest, and I reassured him that I would not set any expectations.  Set the bar low, and you lower your chances for disappointment.  I call it realism, people, not pessimism.  Debate me all you wish.  However, I was most amused by the back and forth that ensued between me, said producer and my mom; who I looped in to answer some of his “historical” questions- I was only ten when we lost Ashley, after all.  My mom called to inform me that he had pressed her to answer whether or not my family had any ‘skeletons in the closet’ that the producer and company might discover if they took up our cause and dug deeper.  My mother’s response?  “We have a lot of personality- we may not be normal-  but when it comes to family and love, dig as deep as you want.”

This exchange stuck with me all week because it’s true- this whole project puts my family under a microscope as strangers are eager to weigh in on whether we’re the good guys or the bad guys or the guys that might be the next media train wreck to watch.  I watch more reality TV that I will ever admit- people, trust me, I understand the appeal.  It’s both inspiring and unsettling to know that so many people out there have now heard our story; I am so protective of my family and it is so hard to not have control over what others are thinking of them.  However I was laughing when my mom shared her response, b it was the best one that any person could have submitted.  We’re not normal.  Put us all in a room and outsiders would be absolutely fascinated to watch what happens when you have my mom and the four of us kids in one room- you’ll hear five different accents as Kayla and Ryan switch off playing the different characters that make them the hilarious people they are, Tara and I will tower over my mom engaging in non-stop banter about her mini, “pocket-sized,” stature, and my mom will oscillate between authoritative adult and bubby teenager.  

However we’re not going to be the next balloon boy saga- in our world, there’s no need to insert artificial drama when by nature our personalities mean more entertainment than a sane person could possibly want to encounter.  We’re not going to waver in our resolve to find Ashley, because I am more than willing to bet, she’s not much more normal than we are- and we want her to have the chance to figure out where in the world that came from.  There will be no reality series stemming from this project, hell no, because then my day-to-day cover of normal, productive citizen would be blown.  There will, however, always be my family to turn back to when things related to this project upset me, surprise me, energize me or inspire me.  They’re the first ones I turn to when life is wonderful or a challenge; they are the ones that are keeping me on this rollercoaster even as the ride makes me even more dizzy.

With love (and resolve to get through more leads today!),

Audra